Watch My Progress

Good morning, good evening and good afternoon.

So let me get right to it. It’s 12:31am… Wednesday morning, when I start writing this post. Who knows when I will actually finish and post this, but that’s the norm.

I’ve been giving some thought as to what my purpose is. Actually I’m always wondering what my purpose is and I am confident that I am still no closer to answering that question. πŸ™‚

That brings to me to this blog. How does it tie in with my purpose?

Initially, I suppose I created this blog to share my personal journey of motherhood and other cutesy things. But clearly that hasn’t been happening. No worries. Life happens. I am busy being a mother. A single working mother. So my time is definitely limited. I am realllyyy working on some balance. But I’m not sure that even exists. How the heck do you find the time? Moms across the universe, PLEASE tell me how.

One thing I am certain of though is that I want to inspire, motivate and uplift. I’ve felt this way for a few years now. We have all been through hard times, heartbreak, loneliness etc. and I know I didn’t go through my trials and tribulations in vain.

With that in mind, I decided to start a Facebook group. Queens In Progress. I legit just started it. I want to help. I want to be that listening ear. We can inspire and motivate one another, as well as share knowledge.

I feel this is a step in the right direction in fulfilling my purpose. I am finally making moves instead of just making plans.

So with time being one of my main issues, I decided to de clutter my social media. I’m not done just yet, but I am making sure I am going to be using the necessary platforms that will allow me to reach specific goals.Β I even deleted some people from Facebook. Like why are we even ‘friends’? I’m going to do the same on Instagram as well. If it’s not conducive to where I’m going, erm, delete. It’s nothing personal, but I’m starting anew.

I’m still in the process of customizing this blog. I can’t see myself adding content when I don’t like how my blog looks. Ovbiously I will still post though. From there I will figure out exactly what the purpose of this blog is and the content I will be sharing. I honestly feel like deleting a lot of my previous posts but we shall see.

I’m a mother, a blogger and business woman. Yes. I’m starting my own business, so I definitely have no time to waste. I need to build up my brand and if that means starting from scratch then so be it.

It’s now or never.

Watch my progress.

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Blogfection In Progress.. .

Listen.. Listen… Listen

Firstly hi. Hi to anyone that reads this, and if you don’t, thanks for popping by anyway.

So yeah. I haven’t posted in a while, blah, blah, blah. I’m a single momma who doesn’t know how to really get in a lot of ‘Me‘ time. I work full time, take care of home…etc etc. Β It is what it is. Β I’m writing something now though dammit and someone better read it. Please? Β πŸ™‚ Β Thanks!

Lol…Anywho.

I’m here trying to edit, I’m sorryΒ customize, this blog. Β I finally grew up and upgraded my plan. I totally used money from the grocery fund to pay for it too. Sighs. I am on a tight ass momma budget, but so it goes. I thank the Lord for His continued grace and favour though, because goodness! He knows it gets tight each month.

Now back to trying toΒ customize this blog. I don’t know what the heck I am doing. I’m not understanding what the categories are for. But as I write this, I think I just answered my own question. Duh.

But seriously, I look at the different themes, see one I like and click ‘save and publish’. I view mine and I’m like ummm what? It obviously doesn’t look the same, but it’s like it’s so incomplete. Something is missing. I think I might delete some of my previous posts as well, but I’m not sure.

Either way, I want my blog to be pretty and um, interesting? I don’t want an ugly blog. Β I realllly don’t. UGH. So don’t get used to the way it looks. It’s in a transition stage. Like when you’re growing your natural hair out and it still has permed ends? You know how it goes? Ok, well even if you don’t, Google it.

So yeah…until next time!

 

Milah x

 

I’m Still Here

I know I know. I’ve been missing. I post a few things here and there and then I go ghost.

I haven’t written anything in a while. IΒ haven’t beenΒ on social media much either. I barely go on Facebook (because it’s been damn depressing!!) and I’ve only just recently posted a pic or two on FB and Instagram. But you can catch me on Snapchat lol, holla at me! I’m a mommy now and my daughter comes first. It’s self-explanatory right? She is my everything and that’s that. Don’t get me wrong, I am currently trying to find that balance. Β I mean shoot, I have dreams and I have goals, but lately they’ve been pushed to the back burner. I have loads of projects to do, but it’s just finding the time to do them. When I was at home and my daughter was small and less mobile, clearly I had more time. Why don’t I have the time? Β Whelp, I’m back at work to answer your question. Since May 11th.Β That’sΒ why I’m trying to find that balance.

Yesss hunty (or bredren), I got me a j-o-b and it feels some sort of good!! Praise Jah!! Won’t He do it?!

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Lord knows I was very anxious to get a job. I will have to share my testimony one day for sure. This has been quite a journey and I hope I will be able to inspire others. Even if it’s just one person.

So any who, I’m at another Β insurance company and I’m definitely enjoying this new role. It’s currently a 6 month contract so we shall see what happens in the near future. I’m going to use every bit of experience I gain to my advantage, but all I can say is the Lord is working things out. While He does His part, I’ll keep doing my part. My daughter is counting on me!

SO! That being said,Β I’m now able to support my baby. I feel like a big girl every time I pay my daughter’s nursery fees. Side note:Β I’ll have to share my feelings on being away from her in another post. Fackin right I miss her chunky cheeks! But being able to buy her food, clothing and pay for the things she needs gives me a sense of accomplishment. I’m a single mum and I gotta do what I gots to do! I’m a very independent person, so having to depend on someone irks my soul. Obviously we can’t do anything in life without some type of assistance, but you get what I’m saying.

NOW…. having said that, I am back. I am back on my grind yo. I am here to build. Ain’t nobody gonna build my empire but moi. I am learning daily and I am building daily. It’s not always easy to stay motivated and to ignore unwanted distractions, but it has to be done. I’m not one to sit and let opportunity pass me by and I sure as heck don’t like those feelings of regret; the woudla, coulda, shoulda thoughts. Nahhh, I got no time for that.

So here I am. Milah, a single working mum, who could have lost herself and her dreams, but found herself before too manyΒ years passed her by. I don’t want to be that mum who gives it ALL up and doesn’t at least hold on to one dream. I’m already 34 and I feel like I’m starting late as it is, but I believe in God’s timing. I believe things happen exactly when they should, and now seems like a pretty darn good time to keep on trucking and make some dreams come true.

 

Mums around the world..Don’t lose yourself..Don’t forget yourself.Β β™₯

 

Milah aka Mommy xo

She Smiles In Her Sleep

It’s 9:09pm, January 6th 2016 when I start writing this. Β I’m in bed supposed to be getting a quick nap while my daughter sleeps. My beautiful little poop machine had her food and is now fast asleep next to me.

I have a draft post where I tell you all about the day I started to labour and when I had her, etc etc. But I was lying here watching her sleep, when she smiled. A smile that melts my heart a thousand times over. So I decided to write this post instead.

My daughter Milahn was born on November 28th 2015 at 9:31am via a c section. It was supposed to be December 3rd but I’ll explain in another post why that didn’t happen. So anywho November 28th 2015; a day that will forever be the best day of my life. The absolute fricking best yo!!

What could possibly top meeting your child for the first time? This precious cargo I carried for 40 weeks was finally here!! She is worth every hormonal crying session, the swollen feet and stinky pregnancy farts. She is my perfect little pudding pop.

As she lays here, I glance at her often to ensure she’s breathing. It’s amazing how many times a day I do this. When I look at her chubby cheeks and perfect little nose all I can do is smile. I love her so so much. I’m truly blessed. She has already made me a better person. The positive impact she has made is truly incredible.

Again she smiles in her sleep, showing off her adorable dimples. All I feel is undying love. I will do what I have to do to ensure she is well taken care of. I will protect her as much as I am able as she comes of age. She is my princess and I will raise a queen.

It’s now January 7th 2016, 6:11pm. I stopped to watch her sleep and ended up drifting off. Lol I’m a new mommy, I’m tired. I’m here pumping milk as I finish this post before my pumpkin wakes up, but all I want is to fall asleep. I keep turning back to check on her, and as usual she’s smiling in her sleep.

Hold up..You know mommy duties stopped me from posting this lol…

Better late than never yeah?

Xo

 

It Was Time To Come Home

As you may know, I was living in London for a year and some months. When I became pregnant I actually didn’t intend on coming back to Bermuda for a few years. My partner, who is also Bermudian, had no real intentions of leaving London either.

I figured I would come home when my daughter was maybe 4 or 5 years old. I didn’t want to separate father and child, but as my pregnancy went on something changed.

London wasn’t home. It was ok for me, a 30 something seeking adventure, but for my baby, no. Quality of life in London was ok as well. We lived in a really nice flat and comfortable area.Β The hospital and doctor’s office was very close by. The High St was not even a minute away and the bus and train links were excellent.

Sutton High St… 17 weeks pregnant.

Thing is, I wanted her to experience what we had coming up as kids. I wanted her to be able to have a yard to play in and to feel the sunlight on her little toes. I wouldn’t have to go far so she can play in the ocean and build little sand castles on the pink sandy beaches.

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Back in Bermuda! First swim in over a year.

She would get to see the Gombeys and eat snowballs, and enjoy what island life has to offer. More importantly though, she would get to be around family.

 

My mum aka Bibi and I. ❣

 

I discussed with my child’s father my feelings and concerns regarding staying and raising our daughter in London. Financially it would have been pretty difficult even though we were both working. I am not one to want to live off of benefits, so I was not trying to go that route. In Bermuda, the cost of living is very high, however you can make a very good wage. You may struggle, but the struggle is much easier compared to the struggles of London.

Then it came down to our support systems. We had little to no family and very little friends in London. Our mothers would have to fly out for the birth and I can say with no hesitation, Β I would have been depressed when they left, had we stayed in London.

I have to say he was super understanding and agreed it was best for us to return to Bermuda. I was soooo frickin relieved after that. I knew I would miss London, but having my first child in Bermuda became a no brainer. Once the decision was made, my pregnancy became really real after that. I was getting more excited and couldn’t wait to be back home.

I knew there would be much sacrifice and we were taking a leap of faith, but we both stepped out on faith when we left Bermuda and we were able to survive in London. Coming back to Bermuda would be easy as it’s home and so far so good.

I was hoping to be temping upon my return, however that didn’t work out as planned. I’m not used to not working so it did get me down a bit, however the free time has enabled me to work on my YouTube channel as well as my blogs. Now my due date is fast approaching so no work for me until February/March. Β It hasn’t always been easy, but I have the support of my family and friends and it has been greatly appreciated.

I suppose you could say coming home was one of the first major decisions I made as a mother and I truly have no regrets.

 

Milah xo